im not Christian; just agnostic.

;Thursday, July 31, 2008

TIME:6.38pm

isit god or isit my incompetence...

things i didnt expect myself to do it was accomplish, things i was confident of doing/achieving gave me a total twist of event and demoralise me more than ever...

i wake up this morning getting ready to fail FTT.. coz i failed BTT 2 times, and alot of my frens cant seem to pass FTT.. so i juz happy go lucky and try luck.. seriously after doing 50qns i not confident at all~ so end test.. suddenly the screen show "PASS" OMFG~~ WOW~~~ and best of all, my bro tommy pass also~ =D

than we went to take Q ticket to buy our provisional driving license.. i fucking wait for 90 minutes or so.. than reach counter le.. they fucking auntie say 1 ticket 1 pax onli.. last time book test at 1st floor 1 Q ticket can be 4 - 5 ppl also no problem.. fucking dulan.. i wanted to reach school by 12 latest to give andrew surprise one lor.. knn~ suck thumb have to re-Q.. fuck.. the 2nd Q time longer.. 120 minute!!! total i spend 4 hours in SSDC today.. after the thing hurry to CWP buy cake than rush to RP surprise andrew.. =D the gals brought him a bear too.. LOL~

so the disheartening thing happen.. i was confident my PP quite organize.. shld be able to get through w/o much fuss.. but the comment my advisor give is.... wtf?

Dear Alex, The draft is supposed to be 80% close to the final PP report to be submitted. Where's your content page with title and pages? Why internet copy image? If you just copy and paste, you are into plagarism. Reject and rework accordingly. Is it close to 2000 words?

The draft is supposed to be 80% close to the final PP report to be submitted. -> actually wat i submit is the FINAL of the FINAL, 100%~

Where's your content page with title and pages? -> i already got content, but i miss out the page number.. my bad.

Why internet copy image? If you just copy and paste, you are into plagarism -> wtf? i quote image source liao.. in reference and also right below the pic.. got wrong?

Reject and rework accordingly. Is it close to 2000 words? -> at the bottom of microsoft words, there's a word count thingy there.. and it says 2219 words.. got problem? hmmm

tks for commenting my work like a piece of shit..

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 5:52 PM

;

TIME:12.20AM

HAPPY B'DAY TO ANDREW and CHEE LOONG!!

just a quick post..

i finally finish my PP report (already make me quite excited)

so i got 10% mood left for tml FTT~ i'll be there to fail.. so i guess i'm reading to get ready for the re-test

nth much to say.. having migraine now, my main priority was to wish the 2 dudes happy b'day = blog again tml..

a note to shiying~ KELLY OWNS OK!~ D-DAY IS BEEN FORGOTTEN~ LALALA

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 12:01 AM

;Monday, July 28, 2008

TIME:1.30AM

I'm not gonna expose too much of jia en's personal life, but after knowing more about Gal-Gal relationship concepts regarding lesbian side.. I tink people got it all wrong. so wat is lesbian about?
yes, u call someone of ur same gender which is a female ur "dear", "darling" or watever terms u can tink of, but les is pretty simple, it's juz 2 female frens who R so close that best fren cant define, yup.. they will do things tat will blow ur mind~ it's juz like how sex help us to "express our love" isnt it?
and lesbian circle is very small, for en case, actually all the falling in love wid each other things are happening around their own small group of "society".. i've got a pretty good idea wat les is now.. really~ and last point to note, lesbian isnt a life-long thing.. it's a short-term thing.

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School was nth much today.. it's already week 14, don expect the serious alex, i need to have my slacking time too.. after school on the train.. i saw a luo han fish~ long time no see liao, don expect me to say hi lor, but i took initiative and walk up front to push her head.. WOO! XUELI DA NOOB!! yea.. it's fun seeing her, i haven have so much fun disturbing someone~ TKS XUELI FOR UR THERAPHY SESSION WID ME! let me bully more ok? i feel better~~ LOL

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i've been chatting wid kel alot recently.. so much tat we might be turning gay.. the dream gal he's looking for is preferbly someone who is "perfect", but wat is perfect? perfect is generated within u, there's no 2 person in this world tat can have the view of the same "perfect-ness"

And it's all this chatting we have done, I find him very much similar to me. not on the outside(i more yandao than him) but in the little brain of ours.. he define it as "higly intellectual", but i would say it's our ability to "a quick mind that live in the future which view things from aspect normal human cant do".. intellectual actually means "an extremely rational person rather than on emotions or feelings." U R NOT KEL when it's come to emotions and feeling. so my definition fits in better for our mindset =x LALALA~~~

1 example of my extraordinary ability would be like a normal convesation, actually before i start a conversation, i've been tinking of as many possible reply this person will give me and i've already think of possible reply to give back and so on~ or looking at 1 person's method of handling a situation, i can come up wid half page of report of tat person's possible character.. it's like living in a state of "future" where u go through the scenario 1st before acting..

btw kel, "like" is a pre-stage of "love".. it takes time to develop.. "continue fighting for wat u tink is right" so kel.. we juz chat another session on MSN.. i've tell the truth to u.. rmb wat i say, acheive the result is top priority.. whether me or anyone else get hurt is another issue

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a note to all.. my MEOWsis have been promoted to RAWRsis =)
she is getting stronger and stronger each day
but if anything happen
I'm juz 1 call away, u know.

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KEL!! u know who u love de, u keep saying is like.. why u so gay!!! must wait for me open kel fanclub than u can start taking action ar.. GAY LAR U!!

No one can really think wat i'm thinking
to most ppl they call it "tian zhen"
but to me
Love is not about possessing
Love is sacrificing
Can u guys do it?
I'm not saint
I'm just trying to find the best possible solution

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 11:07 PM

;Sunday, July 27, 2008

TIME:1am

after 19 days of rest.. I'm back to work.. first thing of cause is to catch up regarding what's been happening around manna recently while I'm "away".. I don expect positive news and I was right. My insider information tells me that boss don plan to continue liao, manna gonna close soon, should be december..

I expect manna to close but didnt expect it to happen so fast.. guess I must really start my job hunting le.. Seriously i've been in manna for near 3 years.. I cant bear to see it closing down, there's so much happy memories.. becoz manna is my 1st job tat allow me to develop my culinary knowledge.. manna was the place i found a lot of friends (too many to list, u guys know who u are).. and lastly manna was the place i know HER, although it's a sad outcome, i did have happy memories when we was together.

I've a few shorlist now.. Delifrance, PastaMania or back to Raffles Town Club de Miyabi Restaurant.. Delifrance is really tempting cause at sembawang onli.. how how?? ARGH~

For 1 second i did tink of buying over manna u know? money is not the problem because i have my saving + my dad fund.. but in E end i'm juz gonna put our money in the drain.. it's not gonna work, there's no way biz can turn around.. manna is facing a dead-end.. it's hard to make biz innocative, esp when u R talking about food.. mayb i shld sell $1 de bubble tea.. OWN SWEETALK DEEP DEEP~~ LOL

another thing also demoralise me liao.. tat noobish arsehole kelvin got 1650 words for his PP~~ OMFG~~ LOL!

now i suddenly find myself in quite a bad situation.. gonna be job-less, PP still not done, why still keep tinking about those emo thing? shit man~I MUST CATCH UP~~~~

still tinking tml wan to go school anot.. got UT leh.. sian.. tml wake up le than decide

and keong, regarding ur entry.. it's true.. but then.. gals still own la~ sian.. LOL! mayb i will consider be gay.. but sorry it's not u~ if i ever be gay.. i would either find kelvin or chris.. u lack the gayness in u keong.. muz polish abit ok? =)

alright.. i'm tired.. tml i will cont to blog cause i wanna type but abit long.. it's about my enie de r/s.. after knowing her for 2 years +.. today i finally know about her past lesbian r/s thing liao !! cause when we chatting she bu xiao xin got loophole let me found it.. MUHAHA.. and i seriously wan to comment on lesbian r.s de perspective.. so stay tune to:

http://materialisticsociety.blogspot.com/ !!!!

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 11:31 PM

;Saturday, July 26, 2008

TIME:

ok.. i was blogging at 4.44am.. at mak house juz now.. but didnt post cause halfway we decided to go home le..

juz now 11pm go jo house meet her than walked to yang house meet him.. than yang drive to pick up kk and mak.. wanted to have supper.. so we went to bukit timah eat teo chew porridge.. finally FORCE jo to eat smth.. it seems like everyday must FORCE her to eat -_-"

after tat reach S21 kopitiam at 1am slack till around 4am.. send jo home le than went mak hse..

i've quite alot to blog out actually but i don know how to start.. this time it's serious.. juz take ytd outing for example.. out of 5 person, all 5 is having their emo period.. me and mak can hide our emotions so we continue to lame around.. if not the atmosphere would juz be like the weather for past few days.. COLD~

anyway.. i juz chat wid MEOWsisJO~ u R so much better compared to last few days u know? all this little baby step progress u making will lead to a change of history.. ur dad is a great motivator, it's really bless u have him lor.. and tks for telling me wat he have told u, becoz somehow i got enlighten too =)

somehow i tink everything was planned..
1st the dream that's so real
2nd the unexpected lost of my blog background which force me to use new blogskin
3rd my archive fix becoz skin changed
4th i went to read my older post all of a sudden
then now~ a confuse me that i don why i'm so confuse

keong told me r/s is unfair becoz gals R the one who can choose most of the time.. so gals out there.. make sure u choose wisely.. it's ur right to reject any guys u know?

actually i wanna change my blog song to a kelly song but i got problem uploading to imeen.. the lyrics is really meaningful (especially the highlighted part)

终于知道你我之间有什么分别
你很天真你很善良却不懂拒绝

这个世界说的永远都不是永远
真的永远是我无法忘记的昨天
在你我之间隔着的永远
永远回不到昨天

而我天生是属于你的啊
怎么能说放就放下
我们天生是活在爱的啊
怎么会在爱里挣扎
在爱里愤怒啊

这真的是爱吗

can u understand? if no~ than no lo~ LOL!
but i understand =p

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 4:39 AM

;Friday, July 25, 2008

TIME:6pm

ok.. let mi continue wid ytd.

THURSDAY
so i headed to school and reach around 10.. lesson was java.. i didnt do much thing ytd.. i was tinking why jo tried so hard to hold onto her r/s while i practically did nothing to savage mine.. i asked myself would i be better holding onto it or proceed wid my life.. tks to jo.. i've found my answer and i've never regret moving on.. it was a better choice..

anyway after school i went home on bus.. coz sky so dark liao.. sure gonna rain.. sry kel~ LOL
while on bus jo call me so i went home than go sun plaza meet her.. it was raining super heavily lor -_-" reach sun plaza half body wet liao @_@

yea.. and i brought her chicken rice and FORCE her to eat.. keep complaning no appetite.. wth? he's enjoyin single life and here u R torturing urself.. there's alot of ppl who still love u ya know? don make them sad.. so i thought it would juz be me and her slacking at sun plaza.. than suddenly xue ling and my nai mei come sia.. WOO~ now i'm surrounded by 3 gals -_-" quite sad la.. they got some topics is keep saying guys R jerk, baddies and etc.. i cannot defend if not i tio also.. LoL~

so racheal and jo ate, than we went to KFC outside there to sit down, I NEVER SMOKE OKAY~ muhaha~ although I super wanted to take cigg from xue ling.. >.< onli racheal and xue ling smoke =p lim pek is guai kia.. woo.. than after tat i tink racheal new scandal bf came to find us, but i left shortly coz i haven eat dinner and mop floor for my mum =x

FRIDAY
ok.. i wanna be serious for awhile.. have u guys had a dream of doing smth and when u woke up it really happen? it happened to me today..

i woke up today, eye abit swollen and tears dripping down.. i rmb crying in my dream.. the dream really spoil my day.. i'm scare now.. my eye did become swollen + tears came out.. was it a vision or a dream? everything look so real in tat dream.. and worst of all, the dream was about HER.. someone who i've not contact ever since the day we put a clear cut with each other a few years ago.. i don know why i had this dream.. she's the 1st gal i've shed my tears for her.. i hope it's a dream really.. i don wan it to happen.. even my mum realise something was wrong.. i woke up at 11 and my face was totally pale + swollen eye.. like ghost sia..

i try to act like nth happen, than i was using my comp as usual keep tinking about tat dream and why did HER appear again.. suddenly got a gal voice shout "ALEX!~" OH MY FUCKING SHIET! FUCKING SCARE THE FUCKING GUTS OUT OF ME.. I THOUGHT IT'S HER~ but it was not -_-" it was joycely, parry and joyco O.o they came hunting for me from school.. lmao

joyce contact dawn for my address so i tink dawn find his scandal bf LAN PA KEONG than keong find yang than finally found my address.. damn surprise can? suddenly 3 fren popout from no where in front of my house XD so we played some cards in my very untidy study-room while introducing them to my nephew mikel~

left at 1+ coz i need company my mum to the theraphy thing.. so here i am.. home sweet home..

i'm gonna end here.. mayb going to mak hse later.. hope yang is driving =\

i really hope it's nothing more than a dream
now i realise how deep u have make this scar to my heart
there's onli pain and agony left
fcuk

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 5:14 PM

;Thursday, July 24, 2008

TIME:9am

early morning, never wake up late, but juz couldnt drag myself out of the house.. mayb tat's wat happen when the semester is coming to a close soon..

login to leo and saw desmond ee comment for me:

Regarding your feedback about Wang Jing and Haneef, I note that what you try to do is to teach your team members. As you know, this is not RP's style. Each member of the team needs to do research to find out about things. Both Haneef and Wang Jing need to be pushed to overcome their language problem - many have succeeded, and I'm sure they can too. If they get help all the time, they will not have enough motivation to learn on their own.

To overcome the problem, you should try teaching less and letting them learn on their own.

fine~ wat to say? at least i try to teach becoz i care for them.. but his last sentence.. is enough, really enough.. i get his point..

ok.. gtg.. to school T_T

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 8:01 AM

;Wednesday, July 23, 2008

TIME:1.05am

this morning damn nice to slp can? the weather is super cooling.. i woke up around 9 but fall asleep till 10.30.. woke up, emo awhile.. went out to meet kel and wj at yishun and khatib respectively but i was late~ went to buy 4D and TOTO.. the Q was long =\

joycely 1st to reach city hall.. follow by me, wj and kel.. wj went to meet joycely 1st cause kel have to get smth for zhen so i company him.. than went to K to sing.. got wj, kel, joycely, zhen and me.. i got phobia to hold mic now le.. i find myself cant reach high pitch anymore.. i tink i know why.. tat time during keong b'day.. i shouted so much tat my vocal gone wrong key liao.. sobs.. i wan my "sexy" voice back.. T_T

after K we went to meet parry and joyce.. had buffet dinner at IT funan mall de sakae.. play zhong zi mi ma~ WASABI version.. huat la.. kel muz really thank me.. i help him clear his flu and all illness.. LOL~~ after dinner everyone so full that we wanna smoke.. so mi, kel and parry was looking so freaking pathetic.. pulling and throwing coins out of the wallet trying to rise 10 bucks to buy cigarettes.. HAHA.. so we manage to get a packet.. smoke afew stick and we was able to come out wid some chalet plans already.. than go home shortly after tat..

i went blog hopping b4 typing this post..
saw keong de post.. really stun eh.. wat happen to u bro?? not like u to blog this kind of things.. chill man..

and to JOJO!!! bro really hope to be ur pillar of strength but today i pang seh u yet again~ i'm so sorry.. tml u gonna get ur car le.. rmb to drive safely hor becoz women are ALL careless driver rmb? =p

mayb sometimes, caring too much for ppl we care might give them the wrong idea.. i've juz learn my lesson.. kpo-ness and caring is juz seperated by a thin line.. this would be my last time.

i can feel my heart tearing~
it's nothing, really..
i'm onli human =)

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 11:49 PM

;Tuesday, July 22, 2008

TIME:11.10PM

HUAT AR~~~ today problem is not really a problem actually.. wasting time =\

but today's class quite cool.. chat wid ppl i've rarely chat in W64N..

1st person i wanna tks is andrew, i know u R trying to wake me up and give me a vote of confidence during our conversation on MSN.. i'll try my best.. i find that 2 of us have similar mindset.. u understand my emo world.. u know wat i'm trying to deliever to explain.. it was really a enjoyable chat =)

2nd person is zen~ he's willing to share wid me so I was able to give comment to him.. it takes time man.. don wry.. label or love~ for now although it's label.. but who doesnt need love? label give a bigger attraction over love but over a long period of time.. she will know that wat she need is love.. don wry =)

a noob event happen in class. kelvin took zen's key in the wallet trying to prank him but in E end he really took the keys home... lmao~ NOOB!!

ok.. going meet yulong le.. he wanna test drive to gombak MRT so i'm gonna meet him up to smoke and do some catching up while getting lost =x

random pics:

Raphael-

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 10:26 PM

;Sunday, July 20, 2008

TIME:1am

from the batman movie, i've learnt tat actually ppl show their real expression when they know they R going to die. wouldnt it be nice if life was more fragile? so we don wear a mask showin other ppl all this fake expression.. we show our fake expression to get peace and stability, it's how this world work.. why R those ppl trying to save the earth? they should live for their main purpose, destory earth with our own hand.. we don have the power to save earth, stop wasting time. it won't work.. oil will deplete, ice at north and south pole will melt, Ozone layer will be gone, human's not gonna fly nor live in space, there's a limit to human's brain. it's the end. no more. kosong.

i'm not emo~ but constantly i like to remind myself of all this things. so i can act like human~ no, i'm human but i'm still lacking somethings to fulfill the mission of a human

anyway.. freaking long post.. get ready to read till u bang wall, curse me and block my blog.. LOL~

SATURDAY
keong set meeting time 9.30 at smb mrt.. in E end we set off at 9.40.. i'm super amaze can? 1st time a major gathering we can set off wid a 10 minute delay onli.. HAHA~ in E past it' always like 30 minute or even later than can go off =x

reach harbour front and went to vivomart to get mineral water and some fruit juices. when we reach the beach 11.30 liao =\ manage to do some sports and get tan~ but quite sad.. i cannot take off shirt at there.. no muscle onli spare tyre very pai sei.. HAHA~~ onli ppl like nik got the muscle to show off~ sadded =(.. don have chio bus also lo!!! sobs~~~ LOL! but this outing is really successful.. tks to keong ba~ for preparing sandwiches and buying of food.. didnt really wanna make him pay and do everything.. so i asked everyone to pay his overall damage to be fair =)

left at 4.30.. we all Q-ing in changing room to bath.. saw nik unpacking his things.. wooo.. sexy sia.. i saw nik taking out a sorta bright red underwear seh.. LOLOL~ i tio stun for afew minute.. HAHA.. i curious so i went to ask around.. in E end as i expected.. nik's the onli one wid red underwear.. WOOT~~

we had problem arranging dinner as usual.. i had to fulfill 2 person's criteria, mak wan air-con place, jun wan cheap.. in E end convince mak to give up his air con than we go khatib eat zhi-cha~ 9 person eat $99 quite ok la... food was good man.. especially cereal sotong.. fucking nice!

after dinner went back semb.. mi and nick didnt wan to go home so early.. so been a "jiu-gui" i suggested drinking.. so we brought a bottle of martini to tom hse.. glen went home and bring his absolut peach come also.. hang also came.. BUT~ never drink much ytd.. coz when i reach tom house.. the mood abit different.. all watching tv and no mood to chat + drink =\

SUNDAY
i thought i gonna spent the day resting at home to recharge myself for sch on monday.. keong & mak was screaming their boredom to me.. i suggested steamboat randomly and they were so steady.. so 1st thing me and keong headed to yishun meet mak and brought a mahjong table than bring it to his hse.. slack and watch tv.. around 4+ we went NTUC meet loong buy steamboat de thing.. spend $74 onli.. as usual me, keong & mak was preparing the stock and the food.. coz we R the onli ones wid culinary blood running in our veins.. surprisingly jun and loong help out a bit, know why? coz they don wan wash the dishes later.. SLACKERS.. nik came last than we start feasting =D yang and wen bo bian do wash-up under keong supervision~ tom and yun came later cause they wanna MJ~

MONDAY
today woke up no mood go sch.. chris's sick.. weather so cooling.. and i'm quite worried about MEOWsis too.. so make up my mind not to go school, go UT onli.. didnt waste my day actually.. i brought my mum to see specialist as her leg have been giving her problem for the last 7 years.. doctor was straightforward. he say no cure but can do therapy to relieve the pain.. 12 session of ultrasound treatment for $800, chance of relieve is 50% - 75%.. last how long cannot say.. mostly last for 6 month.. $800 for her 6 month of relieve.. i hope it works.. haizz

than i sms MEOWsis of cause.. i didnt expect u to take action so fast.. swift and steady.. i'll be there to remind u but u're the onli one tat can help urself.. but i'm trying to stay neutral in our conversation cause i don wan to mislead u~ and if ur final decision is the current one u R making. time will heal the wounds.. tat's wat EVERYONE told me when i broke up.. i don need those words anymore so i guess i'll forward it to u =)
and i'm so so so so so so so so so so sorry for not been able to meet u for mac session.. ticket brought already =x

i took cab to sch for UT.. took cab back to interchange wid kel and joycely.. meet up wid keong and yang at foodcourt for dinner.. than went down to B1 to find MEOWsis cause she was wid her fren jaime i tink.. glen and wen came than watched batman..

the main reason i watch was becoz i wanted to see how Heath Ledger acted.. he's really good~ even i got influence from this movie.. actually his tactic was stupid and straightforward but it manage to counter those willy strategies freak.. and he's really dead now becoz he acted too seriously for the role of joker till he cannot get back to reality.. tributes to Heath Ledger.

hell.. i need to be frank. alex chua is such a fucking dumb retarded asshole
i've fallen in love with u and it has never change
i'm always acting like a fucking dumbass tat don take action
i cant blame anyone else but ME
especially recently i've been acting like a "ice-man"
i'm afraid to get hurt
i'm still been haunt by the past, i commited so much and got a really bad result
i wanna move on
can i? will i?
i really love... Axistz..

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 12:00 PM

;Thursday, July 17, 2008

TIME:1.10AM

THURSDAY
i got 2 'C' grade continuously for 2 day liao.. bad omen? ytd log in leo i saw my web multi UT 2 got a 'C'.. now i login leo see daily grade got a 'C' from the database faci.. very demoralise liao.. no mood for school.. actually it's already week 13.. time to slack?

kayathree was really bad during java.. i thought she's a good gal.. so dissappointed wid her.. HOW CAN U KAYATHREE.. say me manjan ok liao.. but u say andrew from MAMA? so bad lo~~ haha.. okok.. no worries ppl.. juz a lame joke to keep the group discussion more lively.. kelvin sure is a good racist joker creator.. i cant blog it out.. later kanna beaten =x

15 more days to the end of this semester.. not looking forward to it at all.. juz totally bored when i have to self-introduce again.. "hi my name is yong how u can call me alex, i work as part-time chef in country manna at sembawang and i'm 19 years old" so bored =\ somemore in this class, it's a mix of diploma.. which means I will definitely not be seeing those DIT de ppl liao(kel, wj, joanne and more) but i don tink i would be so lucky to be class with current teammates who is from DBC..

FRIDAY
dragged myself to class today.. sometimes working so much for a problem doesnt guarantee a good grade.. especially for today's module .. my standard have dropped for his class.. but seriously i don know how to work in tat team of 4.. joyce is ok~ wang jing is ok when we communicate in chinese~ haneef is still ok when i talk very VERY slowly in english.. how to communicate?? 1 need special english attention and the other one need chinese attention~ why not assign me to be a translator? fuck~

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 10:19 PM

;Wednesday, July 16, 2008

TIME:12.05am

CONGRATS TO MY BROTHER!

he just got promoted at his workplace.. now his position is Software specialist =) this is his 1st job he ever had in his whole life, he never work part time when he was young before.. so proud of him sia~~

last week my mum and bro went to make a bank investment and got 2 free gift which is a 4gb mp4 player (worth $299).. ytd got delivery man send to my house than the delivery man say we can go to tpy and redeem another free gift which is a portable speaker worth ($69)

so today my bro on MC than my mum suggested to go redeem the speakers.. went to tpy and redeem.. my mum always go to a "hong kong cafe" place to eat at tpy.. today 1st time go.. the food there was good but desserts need improvement.. ate till $41 juz for a lunch -_- after tat redeem le went home.. my mum lazy cook dinner.. my bro suggest go dian xiao er at cwp to eat.. my mum of coz agree lor, no need cook ma.. in E end whole family go eat at cwp.. cost $80.50.. still ok la..
it was onli at dinner time my bro told us about his promotion.. which makes me reflect/emo for quite awhile..

it's been years since i've enter a shopping complex wid my father's prescene.. he has been working hard for the past 30 - 40 years.. my memories of him R vivid.. he come home at 7, sleept at 9 and next day would be the same thing.. i've never really sit down and chat wid him.. another reason been his mindset is really traditional and he's sort of control freak.. i don rmb anything we could agree on except scolding government..

my bro was allow to stay overnight at a chalet onli when he was at JC year 2.. before tat.. if he go out wid fren.. my dad gave him curfew.. and he demand my bro's result to be in top notch at all time.. if he score 90 or lesser for A maths, E maths english, science.. he always get beating from my dad.. i don know how my brother survived all this~ i'll be frank, he onli have 2 fren for all of his life till now..

for me.. i took expressway.. because i was pure dumb.. when i'm primary 3,i failed 3 out of 4 paper(Eng, Maths, Science) during my SA 1.. PSLE onli can get into 'N' level(it's counted as a disgrace for the CHUA family criteria -_-), fail 'N' level, 1st person in CHUA family to enter ITE if not wrong, now onli can get into RP.. how i wish i had another surname..

had a chat wid my bro.. i asked isnt he lonely wid so few good frens/bro although he''s earning big bucks now(cannot say the figure =x)? he questioned me is there a need for so many fren and get urself into unwanted trouble all the time just for those 'friends'? he's trying to pass me his mindset since secondary school "keep the useful people around me, destroy the rest and also for honour and glory, friendship is nothing" i really don believe in his way of doing thing.. i cherish my brotherhood, i rather share the honour and glory, i belive doing things together would be meaninngful.. i believing shedding blood and tear with everyone.. i believe............ i believe....... all my belief prove me wrong when it's compared wid my bro.. mayb 1 day i shld take his approach.. but for now.. i'm juz wanna be me..

(MIA: tommy)
if i die tml, ONE of the few things i cant let go the most with be this bunch of brothers

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 10:05 PM

;Tuesday, July 15, 2008

TIME:1AM

now is RP week 12.. finally i can feel the stress from my lesson.. ytd was database.. 1st time i feel so helpless/useless in class.. totally the same feeling like year 1 when I cant solve those bloody stupid science problem but this time around I did not to skip class..

went home after school.. whole person feeling really tired, took a nap at 6.. 7.15 my mum woke me up when i'm really in a deep-sleep stage.. song song kao jurong liao, she trigger my migraine.. i ate dinner.. 7.45 went back to rest and plan to wake up at 9 to watch the tv drama.. but when i woke up is already 7.45 this morning.. and the migraine is still not gone, and it's the kind of pain I tink I would be better off dying.. totally unbearable..

I couldnt step into the class wid my usual half awake emo face + some smile.. black face all the way.. wat worse is after i saw my team.. really feel like fucking off the class.. WHY AM I ALWAYS TEAM WID HER.. lucky faci ask 2 of us to split.. than i change over to zhen's team.. today's problem is learning recording films using a camcorder.. which is bad for me.. firstly my thoughts are always leaning to something (RA)ted and impossible to be done.. secondly the migraine is really tearing me apart, i thought today would be a normal problem whereby i juz stone in class research and my teammates to film can liao.. but it needs the whole team to be involve today.. i didnt wan to give excuse, juz tahan through the day with a smile battling against my migraine..

after sch i rushed off to semb.. couldnt walk wid joycely and zhen =x didnt mean to be PSK.. XD
had to meet enie cause she going out wid her buddy xin to eat and she got a surpise to pass to me.. really damn happy to see tat surprise.. she just helped me to add one more bottle to my collection.. tks enie =D a miniture bombay sappahire(dry gin).. WOOT!

wanna apologize to MEOWsisJOJO~ my bro jio me watch red cliff on sunday liao.. couldnt company u watch sia.. so sorry =x saturday would be our gathering liao =D

been looking at my msn contact.. quite alot of nick which seems emo

MEOWsis: It's better to love someone you can't have , than to have someone you can't love.
TO MEOWsis: I tink it's becoz u have the someone already, thus u tink tat way.. it's not about u cant love him, it's about till wat extend are u willing to walk the path wid him =(

Yang bro: perhaps leaving n starting anew other places isnt such a bad idea after all
to yang bro: i've tink like u before after i broke up wid my ex-her.. but mayb after looking around u, it's not too bad staying here.. unexpected things happen~ don wry

mak: =( where is she
to mak: obviously she is in USA.. i hope u rmb ur promise to me and yang.. next year ur b'day.. tat's the deadline u set for urself.. i'm at wits end to help u, i guess the deadline will do the job to end ur pain.

anyway gonna upload some pics (wed + sat outing pic + my new bottle + my already exist collection)

wed outing de group pic

sat otuing de grp pic~ support big gulp ok? XD

ok. time to intro my classmates. WJ, KEL, PARRY.. notice wen jie face.. CMI liao

the purpose of this pic is to confirm WJ really CMI Liao.. taken wid joycely =D

joycely bf's fren and joycely bf..

geraldine, me, zhen..

my miniature bombay!! SONG BO~

and of coz it's inside my cabinet now wid the rest of my babies.. WOO

i've reach a stage whereby i don know how to express myself anymore
2nd time i'm feeling so cowardly in my life
at the end of the day
i juz wan u to be happier than ytd

1 person have signal me to give up on u
1 person ask me to go for u
another person did not stop me to go for u nor ask me to give up

i asked my mind, heart and soul
my mind say:"it's highly unlikely anything pleasant will come out"
my heart say: "she's the one"
and my soul say:"i need her"

ok.. i better stop.. if not will get depression fucking soon.. lol~ muz hold a meeting wid all my internal and external organ 1st than can have conclusion.

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 10:08 PM

;Sunday, July 13, 2008

TIME:2..30

hello peeps~ how's ur saturday?

i rested at home the whole morning and afternoon.. meet wid kel at yishun around 7.30.. saw eugene on the platform also, he was going to orchad wid his fren.. anyway kel and me went to khatib next and wait for wen jie.. he's LATE~ no time concept.. WEAK! reach bugis at 8.15.. parry was there liao =x anyway we had dinner at food junction than go play 1 hour of LAN...

around 11 we took a cab to aliwan street.. coz we were meeting more peeps there to go to a pub call graxse.. peeps who were there are: Joycely, joycely bf, joycely bf's friend, kingston, geraldine, zhen, me, kel, wen jie, parry, joyce and her 2 fren.. than kel suddenly ask me to watch out.. coz got 13 ppl.. unlucky number.. LoL~

anyway total we drank around 2 bottle ba.. a martel and a macallan 12 yrs. share a packet wid parry, onli mange to chiong 8 stick.. not like last time can chiong 2 packet 1 night.. and kel the smoker make his star appearance by smoking 3 stick sia~~ WOO! grow up liao.. LOL..

alot of them tink tat i emo over some issue~ lol.. it's true la, any guys in my scenario ytd will get emo one, unless u don love the gal than it's another issue.. ppl mostly get drunk and will be high and do all sort of stunt like nicholas but i belong to emotinal drinker type, if i'm drank, either i slp or i cry.. LOL! JKJK~~ XD

play 5-10, 1 round of pool wid zhen, smoke and chit chat wid the guys and mostly of the time drinking myself, coz i scare the guys cannot hold their liqour, drink myself better =x HAHA~ went off at 3+ am and share cab wid kel, geraldine, wen jie and myself..

reached home le than i msg someone if she reach home liao ma, the moment i press send, i also receive a incoming msg from her! my goodness~~ it's the 1st time she "sms" me and not "replying" me! i still go rub rub my eye coz i thought i'm drank and i saw the wrong name.. LOL.. anyway msg halfway wid her she fall asleep le, waited till 5.30am like tat confirm she no reply and conclude she fall asleep le than i went to slp too..

wake up at 11 today.. no hangover or what~ juz tat later need to work at 6 but i gonna push it to 6.30.. coz my bro wan treat me to movie..RED CLIFF! woo~ ok.. i wanna end le.. i don know why recently i type 1 post need so long.. i've been typing since 12.. now gonna 3 liao =\

btw.. i was surfing facebook and THOMAS upload something that makes me go knnccb infront of my comp.. it's a photo i've never expect to see.. and it makes me seriously think tat it's time to go on diet.. fuck!

goodness.. i was so thin back then and wearing the adidas cap I got for myself wid my 1st ever pay i tink, the emo face hasnt change but the fucking fats are coming out.. ARGH~~ keong's hairstyle really fucking lol.. XD

I've make my confession
I don't know what will happen next
There is always something in you that make my heart rushing

我不是个浪漫的家伙
无可救药的我只希望给你多一点,要你开心多一点

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 12:13 PM

;Friday, July 11, 2008

TIME:2AM

HAPPY B'DAY TO MY IDOL KELLY!!! =D

ytd mi and my mum couldnt slp than she suddenly 2.30am say hungry ask me cook noodle for us to eat.. DOTS~~ tks MUM~ she say cannot she fat alone.. i MUST join her becoz i'm her SON~ DOTS~~ in E end i slp at 4am~~

since i slp so late, i was late meeting chris tis morning.. we rushed up to the platform, than i saw a gal de back view not bad wor but abit short.. so i walk up ahead and stand at the other side.. to my horror i saw my MEOWsis lor~~ LOL... first thing in the morning saw her liao~ i thought the rest of my day would be happy go lucky too since i saw her =p.. but things turn out differently

4am slp, 8.30 reach class, 2 word for the day. NO MOOD..

now more and more ppl know + asking who is the "someone" i'm mentioning in my recent post.. i onli wan to stay behind the scene and lookover her coz i tink i pei bu shang her so i hesitated to take action.. =\ but I believe u R the one, nothing will change my stand.

alright.. actually i've been typing this short post since 9pm.. LOL

after so much,
i still hasnt confess to u,
i actually got a sms typed out,
i juz couldnt press the send button.
now i'm back to where it used to be..
it's empty.

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 10:11 PM

;

TIME:

i don know how to start blogging about today.. java module sucks as usual but my faci is really patience wid us.. i onli started doing my work at 1.15 or so.. i don know how to explain wat happen in between.. lost of words.. LOL~

to joycely~ we had a good chat this afternoon i swear! she know who's the someone i've been mentioning in recent post coz she keep forcing me to tell her -_-" but i'm sure we feel better after talking.. fate bring u and ur bf together~ muz cherish =D

to von~ i really never tag ur blog hor~ LOL.. wo shi wu ku de T_T

and to chris bro~ i'm so sorry tat i'm such a bastard.. still haven give u a present.. i'll go to bugis wid u 1 day soon ok.. sorry bro =(

如果你愿意一层一层的剥开我的心
你会发现你是我最深处的秘密

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 12:32 AM

;Wednesday, July 9, 2008

TIME:12AM

i finally push myself to start doing my PP.. i've already do a content layout, now i have to try and fill it up wid 2000 words.. muhaha~

today i went out wid afew of my classmates in RP.. u never see wrongly wor.. is my RP classmates ok! went out wid yu zhen, joyce, joycely and parry.. KELVIN THE NB CHEESEPIE PSK PLANE US~~ SMOKER + DRINKER LIAO NOW VERY DAO CANNOT SOCIALIZE WID PPL!! xD

went to far east, taka, paragon and HMV wid them.. tis one is 1st outing wid them counted not bad liao.. our last stop was starbucks.. that would be the best part of our outing today cause we laughed out loud like nobody biz and we R tinking of chalet during august.. hope everything can proceed smoothly >.<

sian.. tml back to school.. JAVA JAVA JAVA.. i hate this module but i really see how my faci teach us.. she's really trying very hard to make us like this module.. but i'm gonna say sorry to her.. i simply cant like java..

ok... need to stop le.. my bro is damn noob can.. wan share 1 can of beer wid mi but he keep asking mi to pour coz he don know how to pour beer.. ARGH~~ i teach him like 100 times already !!!!

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 10:09 PM

;Monday, July 7, 2008

TIME:12.10AM

today school was ok la.. thanks to shi ying if not GG liao~ tml is web multimedia.. i kinda hate tat lesson becoz of the faci.. u know the 1st thing he write for my personal comment? B+! fuck la~ daily grade got no B+ one.. in E end give mi B.. i really knn dulan till max..

1 very suay thing happen today lo.. not to me.. but to joycely.. she threw her cigg butt on the floor.. kanna caught by NEA ppl.. fine $200.. shit lo.. i really feel sad for her.. don know how to console her also.. so try to be lame and entertain her at least she can laugh more.. poor kelvin kanna molest by her..

class was planning an outing today.. week 11 liao than start to be so happening -_-" a bit too late eh? but i tink it's gonna be fun since we look more bonded now..

btw regarding work.. i let y.hui work tonight's shift for me.. his schedule is really pathetic so i'm onli working sunday 6-10 pm tis week, tat bitch won't even give mi a full shift.. i had enough.. next week i'm not gonna work.. she have a china guy now so i guess it's a good time for mi to take a rest.. o wait.. i haven do my PP~ FUCK!!

will blog again..

as day pass,
i wish i can know more about u,
but it's coming to an end soon,
5 more weeks .............
i guess it's juz a dream for me~

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 11:20 PM

;Sunday, July 6, 2008

TIME:11.45AM

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHRIS a.k.a AH KAM a.k.a KAM HO a.k.a MY GAY PARTNER!! WOOT WOOT~~ HUAT LA~~

O MAN~~ i don feel like going to work now.. super tired la~~ BUT CANNOT SAY DIE! =p

ytd was a really long day for me.. went out in the afternoon to bugis wid my mum and bro.. had lunch at crystal jade la mian xiao long bao there.. the standard there really better than suntec's branch one.. so i would recommend u guys to eat at bugis paro B1 there =D

after makan~ went over to guan yin temple pray wid my bro(my mum go shopping) and go sim lim buy present for my brother.. i brought him a hitachi 320gb 2"5 portable hardisk.. quite cheap lei, $152 onli.. after tat rush off back to parco again -_-" cause yang, keong, nik was waiting for me~

headed down to pasir ris wid them and went to explore the new E hub at downtown east 1st.. still ok la.. tat place is like onli nebo member than will get cheap rate to play and etc.. after tat wen came to meet us so it was finally time, 6.40 we were Q-ing outside the tent for MEOWsis event! went to support her to be the next nebo ambassorder.. overall the event seems very budget but still ok la.. MEOWsis performance also quite good actually, just tat the height *ahem*.. we 5 guys each spam 10 sms to vote for her though she didnt win >.< but it was a good experience~

after the event we went over to the platinum lounge nearby.. we were not staying for long thus onli buy some barcadi breezer to drink.. we saw darts board but no darts there, then suddenly got 1 malay uncle give us afew darts and even teach us how to play.. he very friendly somemore.. when we were about to leave.. he still give us bread to eat -_- somemore we R consider those pathetic spender in the lounge.. onli buy a 5 bucket drink lo~ LoL..

tat's about it for ytd.. reach home onli at 1am like tat >.<>

after reading someone's blog.. i finally got a clear picture now.. lucky i never go do any stupid thing if not malu till MAX~ all my heart's fault for making me think tat way @#$%~ !!

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 10:55 AM

;Saturday, July 5, 2008

TIME:1.30AM

school was ok today.. onli 13 ppl in class today.. everything done smoothly.. and today was rather special.. i finally had a chance to eat school's nasi lemak wid my hand( bring back memory from last semester) i've been eating cai fan for like since school start~

after school walked wid yu zhen, kelvin, joycely, chris and chris fren to MRT together.. as we R walking i had a chat wid yu zhen.. I feel that at her age, she muz work in order to get ur own pocket money + study like 4 days a week wid PP to be done is really a very hard thing to do.. I really admire her hardworking and never say die attitude, although she always say "STRESS ARH", it's understandable de la XD jia you yu zhen! (i tink she don know my blog so i guess she won't be seeing this part) =x

joycely brought yu zhen a advance b'day present sia.. i stun.. becoz it's 5 month in advance de present.. LOL~ a helly kitty cosmetic/jewellery box =D i also not bad lo, i buy 10 deep fried jackfruit coz my mum love them dip dip~ good son ok! somemore tml i gonna pei her go bugis kia kia~ let her happy happy abit coz long time never company her go out liao..

so i meet up wid yang at 7.30 and headed over keong there for soccer, i didnt play today although i was the one requesting for soccer.. i'm quite addicted to the football manager game and I was raphael crap "manager" in the past.. i wan to do it again but street soccer management this time.. wid the right tactic and message deliver to them, i tink we can be more consistent.. i notice quite alot of things today.. i'm actually doing a evaluation of everyone to let them know their strength and weakness..

actually.. i did not mention about my classmate this semester.. mayb it's time i say those who i feel good with ba..

kelvin, perry and wen jie! this 3 gay/joker/gamer/slacker/arsehole would be my 3 best male fren in class.. because perry and kelvin play FM like me so we alot of topic to say, wen jie is lame till max one, quite compatible wid me when coming to challenge each other cold joke

joycely and yuzhen would be the best female fren ba.. i rmb there was a period 2 of them quarrel and i feel sorta stuck in the middle BUT they R ok now..joycely is ok la, pray she don shout can le, can destroy ear drum one.. yu zhen is quite unique, i've describe abit about her at the top part liao but we actually don really talk so much, tks to joycely last time always go break call 2 of us than i sorta communicate wid her.. she's hardworking, serious and very good looking in my point of view but she always say she fat and she not good looking -_- 1 reason might be KELVIN tat ass always suan her -.-" but she's really ok =D

it's been so long since i wrote such a long post sia!

i'm confuse now, my heart is telling me something but i don dare to find out the truth, i scare MALU later.. how sia? ARGH..

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 12:28 AM

;Thursday, July 3, 2008

TIME:10.40PM

keong, yang, nik and loong came to meet mi after school today and had dinner.. it's really a waste i cant intro them to the nice food in RP becoz by 5pm, all stalls R closed or doing closing already =(

so we meet up wid mak, tom and yun then after tat we go watch cockster! hanCOCK! i would say it's not a very fantastic movie, good ending, bad story plot, funny but no sign of climax in the show. 2/5 would be my rating

after the show.. yang and me went home, so as usual we were chatting and he suddenly pour his sorrows to me.. i feel that it's really unfair sometimes but i couldnt give u any advise bro, i'm not fit to give u one, i'm a failure in love myself.. i could onli give u encouragement.. i really really wish all ur commitment and sacrifice will give u a happy outcome 1 day.. Waiting for love is better than out of love, u won't understand the kind of pain i'm suffering nor i wan u to be like me.. the excuses she giving u is really physical terms, if u can melt her, it'll be no problem. trust me! all E best my bro!

at the end of the day
I find myself back to the same spot
I cant move on
I just cant...

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 10:16 PM

;Wednesday, July 2, 2008

TIME:9.40PM

i was onli able to slp at this morning 4.45am~ becoz mak got himself 3 day MC and was bored till max so he asked me to eat supper together wid yang too.. so the 3 of us went to upper thomson for prata, yang was driving which makes everything simple =D the prata is quite good over there.. 3 of us ate a total of 3 kosong, 1 egg, 2 egg wid cheese, 1 mushroom wid cheese, 1 teh tarik, 1 ice milo and 1 milo dinosaur which cost us $16.10..

after makan mak didnt wan to go home, so yang drive over to S21 ( the coffeshop opposite smb shop centre) to go there la kopi.. juz 3 of us sitting down, watching the freaking lame channel 8 old old old old old shows and we trash things out till almost everything under the sun.. talking about future, friendship, love, past and ambition.. a really long chat.. finally mak willing to go home at 4.15am.. phew~

i really planned to start my PP today.. but i woke up at noon, and my bro treated me to lunch at sakae sushi.. after tat i reach home and i cant start my PP at all.. totally no mood~ or should i say.. my mood already spoiled..

the talk wid mak & yang ytd night makes me realise I'm still at the same spot.. i did not move on, i've change after my breakup, i'm not myself anyway.. especially in school, i can go silence all of a sudden.. i do not love her anyway. problem is i find myself not able to into the next relationship, i've been giving mak negative comment the whole night for his scenario, i was like him in the past been a fucking naive person.. i don know wat i'll do if the next time i find out all my commitment to a new gal have gone to the drain again like this one.. i will end my life, seriously i will..

in the end, i spend the fucking day emo-ing and couldnt proceed wid PP~ FUCK THIS SHIT LA~ I DON KNOW WAT TO DO!!!!!

-Avenger In The Making
my post R copyright, approach mi if u wan to use them. THANKS!

Blogged @ 8:57 PM

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