The world is evil, I hate the world: how society functions, how materialistic we all are, how judgemental we are, how appearance orientated we all are, how capitalist we have turned out, how sinful we are, how selfish we are, how we destroy our world I reckon God should just kill us all and start the human race again.. No, im not Christian just agnostic.

; Alex Chua ; 1st of December

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Went to see a ENT specialist recently at a hospital because I had a persisting nose bleeding problem for about 6 - 8 years already. Didnt really wanted to fix the problem cause I wasnt bothered by it but since it's subsidized for me, why not go see what's wrong with this nose of mine right?


Preliminary result/diagnose by the doctor was he think I have nose cancer because he saw lumps growing at the back of my nose/throat pipe, what a news for me... who would have expect to hear from the doctor that he/she have been diagnose with cancer from a casual medical appointment.


He wanted to do an endoscope but I delayed it because I feel a need to let my parent know first. It was a stupid decision come to think of it... End up make them getting worried more especially now that my mum has become a permanent disabled person and his son having a possibility of getting cancer.


Now everyone wants me to do an endoscope, so be it.. 20th April will be the deciding day.


Truth is I rather discover this illness at the last stage and die rather then finding it early and get treated. I'm tired of living.


Tired of living in a society based on social norms
Tired of materialistic people
Tired of getting judge by people who are appearance oriented
Tired of loving
Tired of everything . . .